Monday, June 02, 2008
I had an awfully traumatizing experience yesterday which resulted in me commenting this to all my girl pals, " I now realize the importance of a brazilian wax".
Planned to meet the girls at 1pm at Ngee Ann poly to return our graduation robes so being the lazy me, i decided to take the long MRT ride to Clementi instead of taking the bus. Awful choice i would say. When the train was approaching Clementi Mrt Station, i suddenly heard mother nature calling. Was deciding whether to answer it at Clementi station or wait till arriving at Ngee Ann. As i didn't wanna wait another 15 minutes to relieve myself, i decided to answer nature's call by going to the toilet of Clementi Mrt. Once again, another wrong choice.
Seeing that all the cubicles were taken, i waited patiently for any one to open up. One did open up finally and all i saw was this 50 year old aunty with unzipped pants, standing right in front of me. I swear i could see a few strands of pubic hair then. She spoke to me in chinese, " 小妹，你可以进来帮我脱裤子吗？我的脚痛得很厉害，不能弯下来。” I was in shock. I didn't know how to react to her pleas and she continued, “我很急，近来帮我！” With that she pulled me into the cubicle and locked me in. And that just abandoned all hopes of me ever winning in 4D or Toto.
Once in the toilet, she asked me to take off her pants for her. At first, i thought my job was only to pull her pants low enough for her to sit on the toilet bowl. Little did i know that she expected me to remove her pants so that she could pee, man's style. I squatted down and removed her pants from her legs halfway praying that i wouldn't be too slow before her bladder bursts. All these while, i was keeping my eyes to the ground and never once did i lift my eyes to see that great piece of art.
Having done her business and instead of asking me to put her pants back on, she kept ranting about how she fell and what could have caused her fall. I was really trying very hard to be sympathetic but all the while i was just thinking of the huge piece of mess and wondering when she would be humble enough to cover it up. FINALLY, she asked me to put it back on for her so i squatted down again not before hoping that she cleansed her private part properly lest any of her waste drips onto me.
Even after putting of her pants, she still didn't want to zip up and went on to repeat her story a second time. This time, i was thinking of a different thing. I was really urgent by then and i was thinking of telling the aunty this, "其实我现在也很急，你可以先出去吗？不让我可能需要你帮我把裤子脱掉！” She left after 3 minutes and thank god for that.
Ah well, enough of female pubic hair and private parts. Let's move on to something less uptight and more cheerful. I finally met up with chin swee after one year! We had dinner at Food republic then headed down to Dim Sake Bar at goodwook park hotel for some sake and then to acid bar for some really good mojitos. All in all, it was a great night and i'm glad to have you back babe.
And i'm still very much traumatized
Lovely Angel <
8:15 PM
